It's a good thing that the "American" church is dying!

Being a parent is tough.  Disciplining your kids is tough.  Our family has reached the stage where my oldest two have at least a dozen altercations a day.  A lot of the classic, "she's sitting to close to me!!!!!" fights to break up.  What can be extremely frustrating for us is dealing with fake "I'm sorry's".  You know what I am talking about.  Sibling gets mad and hits their brother or sister.  You tell them to give them a hug and say that they are sorry.  They slowly walk over, don't make eye contact, mumble out a forced, "I'm sorry", look at you and say, "I did it".

We all know that they really don't mean it.  But you have to start somewhere.  One day they will no longer be under my care(and control) and I pray that they grow into people who don't have to be forced to say that they are sorry when they mess up.  In this stage of their development, we recognize that my five year old is not prepared to make his own life decisions and go off on his own.  Will he be prepared to one day live without dad guiding him?  I can guarantee one thing though, if I infantilize him from today until he is 18, he will really struggle making decisions on his own. 

In our lifetimes we have seen one of the most radical cultural and sociological shifts to have ever occurred in such a short window of time.  Only 50 years ago it would have been virtually unheard of for someone to not at least claim some sort of allegiance to Christianity.  And membership in at least some sort of denomination was a given, especially if you were going to be "somebody" within your community.  Today, the fast growing segment of the "religious" population are the "nones".  This means that people who have ZERO religious affiliation are rapidly outgrowing an ever shrinking involvement by the populace in churches.  Only around 50% of Americans even go to church consistently.

Now, before this motivates you to go posting some sort of viral meme on Facebook about how if we let kids in school have bibles there would never be a school shooting EVER EVER EVER again....let me tell you something.

This is a good thing! 

This might be a great thing!!

For centuries involvement in a church and self-proclamations of a Christian faith was a non-negotiable.  Like a five year old following rules they didn't care about, many people went through the motions because they had no choice.  Charles Spurgeon, the Prince of Preachers, was arguably one of the most famous pastors in the 1800's.  To this day his wealth of teachings and sermons are inspiring future generations of church leaders.  And he estimated that less than half of his congregation was really saved.  And that is why he made a point to regularly preach the gospel. 

Back in the 1800's.....

When everyone claimed they were a Christian....... 

One of the most influential pastors of the past  two to three hundred years, was fairly confident that half the people who called him their pastor didn't really get the Gospel. 

The Church in the West, and particularly America, has been co-opted by interests and motivations that are not generally in alignment with scripture and the Gospel.  It was the nations biggest country club.  If you wanted to get ahead, you better get on the board at your local "First Baptist Presby Methodist Church of Christ Redeemer" so that you could make friends with the other movers and shakers in town.  Presidential hopefuls had to make pilgrimages to make nice with famous church leaders so they could signal to everyone that they were just like them.....Nominally into that Jesus fellow.

What was the result of the Church being hand in hand with power?  People who care about power running the Church.

With the growth of the internet, more and more stories are popping up about horrific leadership abuses, coverups and church implosions.  There are even compelling(and damning) research papers that delve into why the pulpit attracts people with Narcissistic Personality Disorder at an exponentially higher rate than they exist in society in general.  As long as the Church can be seen as a gateway to power and money, people who want power and money will gravitate towards the Church.  Which only leads to more and more people saying, "I'm done with this".

Ok.  Enough of the bad...

Christ did not come to establish an Earthly kingdom where all of his buddies got to be in charge of everyone else.  Jesus had to even correct one of their moms in Matthew 20:20 when she specifically asked that her little special angels be given cushy roles.  Instead, Christ established His Church for the purpose of proclaiming the good news and to make disciples of every nation.  And in practice it was to be accomplished through serving others sacrificially(Matthew 20:16--First last, last first passage), while knowingly accepting persecution(Matthew 24:9---you will be persecuted and the nations will hate you because of me passage). 

Does this sound like many of our churches or leaders today? 

We are a lazy Church in America today.  We have had it so easy for so long we just want to believe that everyone should just see it our way.  And, if we face even a modicum of "persecution" we raise millions of dollars to politically fight our enemies and elect people who give us just enough lip service that we think they will at least vote the way we want them to. 

When the Church in America stops worrying about losing its power, or its perception of prestige in our communities and nations, THEN it can get focused on what it exists for.  Proclaiming Christ crucified!  And when that becomes the heart beat or our churches, they WILL have less political power, and perhaps even less money.  But guess what?  Then we will stop finding ourselves led by people who were there for the money and power!

I don't want people coming to church just because they have to.  No more than I want my son to only say he is sorry because I told him to do it.  We should all desire that people have their lives radically, and permanently, changed by the Gospel of Jesus Christ.  When we stop relying on power and control to get people to act "right" we can begin to do the real work of letting the Gospel change them from the inside out.

You will be shocked to know that signs like this are not turning around the

fortunes of the American Church

True Love in a Romanceless Marriage

Why did you get married?  If you aren't married, what are the reasons you would want to be married?

If you read Nicholas Sparks books(please please don't) you would probably answer something about love, romance, fate, etc.  The common dream is that we find some perfect person who will give us continuous butterflies in our stomach and satisfy our deep desires for romantic intimacy.  If you can only find that perfect Prince(or Princess) your story book life will begin and you can live happily ever after. 

Marriage has become a strangely one sided affair.  Yes, I know it involves two people.  But the basic assumed premise of a successful marriage is that YOU are in some way satisfied by the person you are married to and the circumstances you find yourself in.  And when either one person or both individuals no longer feels this way the marriage comes to an end. 

While many may bravely soldier on under these conditions for a period of time the foundational narrative of personal satisfaction overrides other senses.  In my relatively young life I know a number of my peers who have been divorced.  In not once instance were there occurrences of abuse, infidelity, criminal behavior, etc.  They were all cases of, "We(or I) are no longer in "love" with that person". 

No wonder people keep waiting longer and longer to get married!  When you are contemplating committing your life to another person against the backdrop of a culture that says marriage is about love alone when we know how fleeting such emotional feelings can be, the risk seems too great.

In Ruth chapter 3 we have the story of Ruth basically using cultural and religious obligations to convince an older man(Boaz) to marry her.  Our modern sensibilities balk at this story.  Where is the love we ask?  The romance?  The passionate kiss in the rain after they both discovered how much they truly needed each other!!?!?!

The book of Ruth is a foreshadowing of the story of Christ and His Bride(the Church).  The picture of what a marriage is in Ruth is a radical departure from our modern concepts.  Yet it is a picture of the most important love we can ever observe and experience. 

Marriage is not based on "romance", but Love.  These are wildly different concepts.  Starting with Love can, and often, develops romance, romance is not a natural step on the progression to Love. 

Romance is something you feel.  Love is something you do, regardless of feelings.

Romance is an outflow of attraction.  Love is not based upon attraction.

Romance is a temporary event or condition often sourced in impulse.  Love is a permanent act of the will.

Romance is conditionally offered.  Love is unconditionally provided. 


The message of the Gospel is that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.  And the maintaining of our relationship with Christ is not dependent upon us, or, our actions, but completely based upon the character of Christ. 

How would it feel to know that your Eternal destination was dependent upon your "wining and dining" God through your own "appeal".  And, if for whatever reason, God grew tired of you, or you were no longer up to snuff, He said, "You know, it's not you, it's me.  We have just grown apart.  Sorry".............

The True Love Boaz and Ruth experience is not trying to find some perfect person to compliment their personal preferences, but to instead commit life to service to the other.  This is an act of the will, not the impulsivity of feelings.  Christ offers us the Gospel not because we satisfy some sort of romantic need in His life, but because He has chosen to be our Agape Lover and Guardian Redeemer.  Our appearance, intelligence, personality, etc, have no bearing on the stability of our marriage to the Lamb. 

Ask yourself, "Am I looking for a romantic marriage, or, am I looking for sacrificial Love that serves the other, and not the self?"  When the years go by, the kids and jobs come and change.  When the decades tire you out and exhaust your patience.  Which will sustain you?  A whirlwind trip to Paris, or, a spouse who is committed to give the best of themselves to you regardless of the circumstances?

The modern marriage is not a picture of the Gospel.  The Gospel is a picture of Marriage! 

Old couples don't get there because of how many romantic dates they took, but how many unromantic days they stayed.

Country Club or Hospital

When we were kids my sister and I would often spend time at my dad's church office.  They had this super powerful electronic stapler that we were clearly and strongly instructed to not get near or touch due to the potential of bodily harm that such a device posed for two little kids.  These instructions had a clear understanding that failure to follow the rules would carry with it dire consequences. 

Due to the fact that I was always super obedient and the perfect child(and the favorite one which is clearly demonstrated and confirmed by our mother....) I followed this rule.  My squirrely little sister on the other hand....well....lets just say she was not as perfect as I was(and am).  One day she happened to stick her thumb into the opening, causing the stapler to launch a staple right through her nail and thumb.  Realizing that she had broken a rule that carried consequences she kept it to herself and quietly whimpered in the corner holding(and hiding) her thumb. 

For a few hours that day she kept it a secret, avoiding our parents and clearly being sad.  Finally, upon going back home my mom held her and asked her what was wrong.  My sister tearfully said she didn't want to say because she didn't want to get in trouble.  After some convincing and promising that she could tell mom anything, she finally revealed the heinous injury.  In the blink of an eye she was rushed to the ER to have it removed. 

The worst part is that she didn't even get in trouble.  I though at least a few spankings were in order.....because I love my sister and wanted her grow up to be a responsible adult!!  But we did learn a valuable lesson; when you are hurt mom and dad are a safe place to share your hurt and you won't be "hurt" more for sharing what happened.  Even if your pain was due to your own choices!


When you are hurting where can you go to weep? 

Sadly, for too many people, Church is the last place you think of.  Even if you go there for help it is common to have help be given with a heaping dose of judgment.  You are already hurting enough, and the last thing you want is someone telling you that you are just getting what you deserve. 

Here is the worst part about churches and pastors presenting that sort of attitude to people;  The whole message of the Gospel, which the Church is called to proclaim and practice, is that in Christ we don't get what we deserve.  Instead of hearing "Come all you who are weary...my yoke is easy and my burden is light", people hear, "Come all who are screwed up and we will give you a bunch of burdens to pile on to your exhausted shoulders".....

Many churches today are glorified Country Clubs where you come to look good and show people that you are checking off all the right "behavior" boxes.  Struggles, pain, frustration, questions and hurts make people uncomfortable.  We are here to smile, shake hands and keep up appearances. 

Christ's church is not a country club, it is a hospital.  It is SUPPOSED to be a place where people who are broken can come to be loved and have their pains treated.  How would you feel if you walked into a hospital with a broken arm and the staff looked at you like you had the plague and said, "Ummmm....you know this is your own fault....helping you is going to be a bit inconvenient for us today.." 

When you arrive at a hospital they ask you what brings you there that day, they listen to you, they address your concerns, they do everything in their power to put you back together.  They don't ridicule you and blame you. 

They listen, empathize, and, HELP.

Many churches talk at you, judge you, and never want to help. 

Let me challenge you if you lead in a church, or, are a part of a Church.  Are you trying to maintain a country club, or, are you serving a hospital.  If your church feels a lot more like a country club, you are doing something wrong. 

When people need help, but they don't feel safe asking for help, it gets worse.  In the book of Ruth we learn about how a family runs from Israel to Moab because of a famine.  In Moab everything goes horribly wrong.  Then we find out that back in Israel, the whole time, they had a family member who was wealthy.  Why didn't they ask for help before they ran away?  We don't know. 

But this story plays itself out every day in our communities.  People are too embarrassed and afraid to ask for help.  And sadly ,things get a lot worse as they hide their pain and heart aches. 

Is it your fault that people are too afraid to ask you for help?  If no one is asking you for help, it probably is.  What are you going to do about it?

 

Waiting and Acting

My wife and I have wildly different personalities when it comes to getting things done.  On one far end of the spectrum you have me, the cautious personality.  Not knowing exactly how to do something causes me to lock up and do nothing until I know more about it.  For those who know me, it will come as no surprise to hear that I am the worst handyman in the world.  My wife recently asked me if I could try to fix our hose roller upper thingy(I think that is the technical term).  The thought of doing something that I don't know how to do has caused me to not even think about it....for two weeks.....My wife is saint like in patience.....

On the other far end of the spectrum my wife likes to jump without looking.  She may have no clue what she is doing, but she is going to, by force of will, fight her way through it.  Even if she ends up breaking something.  Which has often happened. 

These differing approaches to life have been no small source of conflict in our marriage.  She gets frustrated with my constant waiting to act until I "know" more....and I become a stress ball when she decides, at midnight, that she is going to cut a hole in our basement door......without first measuring it for a potential kitty door.....

There needs to be a balance in life between these positions.  Running head first into a problem can often lead to head trauma.  Sitting on your hands too long can cause you to miss the window of opportunity. 

When the Gospels end Jesus has given the disciples all the "information" they need and gives them the universal Christian marching orders to "go and make disciples".   So....game on....?  Nope....they go and "wait". 

In Acts 1 Jesus' final words was to go to Jerusalem and wait for the Holy Spirit.  And so they go and wait on God.

As a Pastor, husband, father, and amateur chicken farmer I am really good at "knowing" the right things to do.  I would be perfectly competent to compile all the pertinent information and data into a reasonable instruction manual for anyone to operate in these capacities.  If you would ask me what should be the first 5 things a Pastor should do in leading a church, I could quote you chapter and verse the tried and true formulas of "success". 

If the best information is so readily available why do so people experience "failure" at the virtually same rate they experience success in their marriages and ministries?

We act with the right information at the wrong time.

To illustrate this let me take a hypothetical scenario from my own marriage......My wife is currently in the final few weeks of pregnancy.  She is tired, can't sleep great, sore, etc.  And like most pregnant people with two small children to deal with as well, she can get a bit ummmmm.....irrational......(don't hit me).  Say my beautiful bride forgot to do something she said she would do, and then later she is feeling exhausted and emotionally frayed and is expressing her burn out to me.  Who thinks it would be a good time to bring up her mistake????

If you said yes....welcome to the couch.....

The information is correct, and in most contexts addressing the problem is probably a good thing.  But the wrong timing is destructive! 

The disciples have all the information they need to preach the Gospel, but they need to wait on God's timing.  In Acts 2 we get the amazing story of the Holy Spirit causing them to preach to the crowds that can each hear the message in their own native tongue.  The event is so powerful that vast crowds place their faith in Christ. 

What would have happened if they hadn't waited on God's timing?

Surely they would have still experienced success.  The Gospel does not come back empty.  But the powerful testimony of Christ resurrected would have not been infused with the very real and present power of God Himself.  It would have been just the words spoken by mere men.  In God's timing it became not the disciples testimony, but the active and visible work of a risen Savior. 

In the church "industry" there is no small number of self-help books and leadership manuals that promise greater returns on your ministry investment.  Many of them directly contradicting the others in their proffered operational paradigms and practices.  And, don't get me wrong, the information and insights they provide can be extremely beneficial to grasp and utilize.  But....we have a tendency to take that information and then apply it through the lens of our own planning and understanding. 

To take a silly example that many people may have experienced in some capacity.  We know studies show that unchurched millenials appreciate contemporary music more than an organ and hymns.  Armed with that information churches will often start exclusively doing contemporary music.  One church that I have dealt with dropped traditional music in their older church(median age 45+) and started contemporary style worship.  Which frustrated the older and faithful members. 

So did they at least reach the young and unchurched?  Nope.  Their idea for contemporary music was singing along with 20 year old CD's of songs that were "cool" in the mid-90's.  Not exaggerating.  So they frustrated their older people, and looked embarrassingly idiotic to the young people that did find their way in the doors on a Sunday morning. 

The information wasn't wrong, they just mishandled it and mistimed its application. 

How do we get our timing right then?  Whether in ministry, marriage, careers, or, family?

The backdrop to the miracle in Acts 2 is that the believers were gathered TOGETHER, seeking God's will.  It doesn't explicitly state they were praying.  But we know from the New Testament testimony that prayer and worship communally was what believers did when they got together. 

There will rarely be a time when you get some audible instruction to "go".  But your timing will not be right if you aren't worshiping and praying with God's people and seeking their fellowship, encouragement and advice. 

Whether you are trying to nail down the right time at home or in church....who are YOU praying with?  Who are YOU waiting with?  Who are YOU seeking counsel from?

Do you want to get your calendar aligned with God's? 

Be with His people.

Getting the timing right will profoundly shape your future

The Visible Christian Life

What does it look like to be a Christian?  Beyond the simple answers, like...fruits of the spirit....believing in Jesus.....repentance....etc?  But what are some of the markers of the natural outflow of a Christian's life that go beyond the internal and "personal"?

Contemporary Christian practice has become seemingly synonymous with individualism.  Which basically becomes, "I prayed a prayer this one time, I believe in Jesus...#winning"(I love dated references....)  And from that moment on this person is self-confident enough to then proceed to live exactly how they want.....on their own.  

But is this idea of "Me and JC are good, so that's all I need" really accurate? 

⁵ This is why I left you in Crete, so that you might put what remained into order, and appoint elders in every town as I directed you--Titus 1:5

Paul is writing a follow up letter to his co-laborer Titus about what to do post-evangelization in Crete.  Paul's ministry was to go all over the Roman world and proclaim the Gospel.  Many people would respond in faith to this message and at that moment become "Christians". 

In today's culture we do the Gospel proclamation part, and then.........um.......not much.  What does Paul instruct Titus to do?  To put "Order" to this new group of Christians.  What does order imply?  Clearly defined structures and systems.  It does not imply a loosey-goosey every man for himself post-conversion experience.  The assumptive position that Paul takes here(and through out the NT) is that Christian's would associate together in some manner of "ordered" community.

To be clear, he does not say, "Make sure these folks have a "church" so that they can finally REALLY become Christian".  Instead, he writes with the expectation that becoming a Christian naturally leads itself to deliberate(orderly) community with defined structure and consistent and accountable fellowship. 

To ignore this plain faced obviousness that is found throughout the New Testament is to deny the validity of the New Testament as an accurate revelation of God and His call to His people. 

Perhaps that last sentence offended you.  Good!!  Let me explain it slowly.....Either the Bible is reliable as a full testimony of God and the Gospel or it is not.  If it is NOT reliable, then, by all means, interpret it anyway that you choose to do so.  If it IS, then what it says to us is important! 

Find anywhere in the New Testament where the assumption for the Christian life is NOT shaped by an orderly community with established leadership(Elders) and I will concede my point......

Found it yet.....no?????  Ok, lets proceed....

The second part of this passage from Titus describes the responsibility of Elders;  1)  To be above reproach(to put it in short form), and, 2) To teach and defend the Gospel message from error and falsehood.  3)  Bring discipline to those who are teaching falsehood.  And this discipline has two purposes; 1- To protect people from untruth, and, 2- To bring the false teachers to repentance!

So, back to us and our Christian lives.......

A Christian's life is outwardly displayed by first belief and repentance.  Belief in Jesus and repentance from sin.  Where things like the fruit of the spirit can be great measurable markers of this.

The second aspect of outwardly displaying the internal reality of a Christian is participation within an "ordered" community.

Does perfectly exhibiting these two aspects MAKE someone a Christian.  Nope.  But will a Christian display these behaviors in their life.  Yep. 

This is going too far the other way......

There is Always Another Hill to Climb

The most exhausting part of life is that it keeps going.  What you did yesterday, you have to do today.  Every hill you have conquered will have to be conquered again.

Sadly, we often fail to rise to the occasion.

In today's modern western culture we have this exaggerated sense of self-worth that demands we are "owed" something.  We want to rest on yesterday's success and use that as a barometer for the entirety of existence.  There is even a very interesting and insightful article here that explains these delusions more eloquently.    Yesterday was hard, I don't want to have to do that again today....or...tomorrow. 

This plays out in a variety of situations and relationships.  We work hard once, and try to ride that single success into the sunset.  And while a singularly great moment can carry you for a while, it only goes so far.  When I was in financial sales I would have months where I made gobs of money(relatively) but if I stopped working, within 4 months I would be broke again.

A correlating effect of this attitude is that we try to make everything we do become the "NEXT BIG THING".  It isn't enough just to do your job, keep your nose clean, and keep plugging away.  Swinging for the fences is what it is all about.  And we exhaust ourselves with this behavior.  We only apply ourselves to something huge, and let the little steps drift away. 

Think of the places you see this play out...

The husband who was a hopeless romantic when you dated, but now comes home from work, sits on the couch until he falls asleep and doesn't remember that this weekend your mom is coming to visit.

The athlete who had a great year, and comes back from the off season 40 pounds overweight and unwilling to listen to his coaches anymore...because he knows better!

The church that did things in a certain way 20 years ago and grew rapidly.  And so today, they keep doing that same thing, and are confused and frustrated that the young families they used to reach no longer visit them and stay. 

The parent who was really engaged with their son when he was young, but don't know the name of their teenagers best friend today.


What got me thinking about this is from studying Exodus.  It starts with this reminder of Joseph and his brothers and then says, "Then a new king to whom Joseph meant nothing, came to power in Egypt".   And thus began the downfall.

We don't know the particulars of the Israelites experiences post Joseph and Pre-Slavery, but that is an important line for us.  It would seem to indicate that the successive generations were quite willing to ride on the coattails of Great Uncle Joe.  And when his impact was no longer relevant and contemporary, they were on the outs. 

They didn't make a name for themselves on "This Day", they let yesterday do their work for them. 

Life is a series of repeats.  Every day you have to climb back up that hill.  Carry that torch.  Do your job. 

Where are you today?  Are you willing to put in the work you did yesterday?  Or, are you coasting?  You might think coasting is the easy option.  But let me tell you that is a lie.  Playing catch up is always more exhausting than just doing a little bit of the right thing every day.

Who Do You Think Jesus Is?

One of the neatest toys from childhood is Mr Potato Head.  A simple little toy with hundreds of options.  When I was a kid my favorite thing was to make the potato head into a creature straight from a nightmare...Eyes where the arms go, arms out of the eyes, nose on top of the head.  It just wasn't as fun to just make him look normal.

That attitude of remaking everything to suit our own needs/desires is a pretty common one.  We try to remake our spouses, our friends, our jobs, our kids, etc.  Too often we don't want to accept things and people the way they are, we want to remold them after our own images. 

And this attitude influences our relationship with God.

God and Jesus have been through quite a makeover the past few decades.  Amazingly the makeover has less to do with God Himself, and more with culture.  The God of scripture has always stood over cultural trends and eras, but lately it would appear that an "evolving" society is tired of a God who draws us to Himself and out of our selves, but instead is looking for a god that will follow and affirm where we have already decided to go.

I was recently reading an article about someone's problems with the bible and church.  An actual statement was that the bible needs to be updated and revised to be more in alignment with our new society.  This is the sort of god that is no longer an "embarrassment" to those with more nuanced and modern sensibilities.  It is a god that is a fancy designer handbag to wear as a philosophical accessory.

The response by orthodox believers and the church has sadly been unhelpful.  It's not that they don't try to speak truth when issues arise, but that they are spending all their time running from fire to fire desperately trying to put it out, without ever addressing the problem of what is starting all of these fires.

¹⁵ “But what about you?” he asked. “Who do you say I am?”
¹⁶ Simon Peter answered, “You are the Messiah, the Son of the living God.”
                  Matthew 16:15-16

At the heart of all of these debates is that we are not asking and answering the fundamental question....Who IS Jesus. 

When Jesus becomes nothing more than an accessory to add and remove depending on our current whims, than we can manipulate him to fit into any box we desire.  Don't like what he has to say about sin, pop out that interchangeable part and pop in some "love" instead.  Worried that his statements about sex and marriage are too antiquated, pop that out, pop in some affirming philosophical mumbo jumbo that makes you feel better. 

If the answer to the question of who do we say He is, is that He is the Messiah, then all of that changes radically.  The son of the Living God, the King of Creation, the Risen Messiah, is not some childish toy that we manipulate and adapt to be more appealing to our current thought processes.  Instead of demanding He adhere to our standards, we are forced to recognize that it is us that must adhere to His.

Timothy Keller wrote that if the God we are following seems to always agree with how we feel, then we are not following God at all, just an idealized idolatrous image of ourselves.  If Jesus is the Messiah, than there is a implied correlating truth;  You are NOT the messiah.  This means that our own opinions and thoughts on a matter should be held skeptically.  The goal is not finding a way to shoe horn God's opinion into alignment with our own, but to be willing to submit our thinking to His Truth. 

As long as we do not address this fundamental issue, "Who IS Jesus??", we will always be putting out fires.  Should we speak truth in the face of falsehood?  Sure.  But if we do not address the heart of the matter, there will always be another fire to put out. 

Defiled Churches

I bet you like the way your church "does" church.  Well, at the very least, you like it enough that you call it your church.  But how would you feel if your church made some significant changes?  I don't mean that they stopped preaching from the Bible but instead utilized the Koran, or, the Book of Mormon.  The type of significant changes I am referring to are...

1. Changing the type of music

2. Changing the order of service

3. Dropping something like the midweek evening services to replace it with something like small group home bible studies.

4. Your pastor stopped wearing robes/collar and began to dress "casual"

How would you react to those sorts of changes?  Or, how do you feel about churches that do those things differently than you do? 

Nothing seems to get Christians riled up more than how they "do" church.  There seems to be this streak of antagonism within the Church today that seems to say we can't really be happy with our church(or theological/doctrinal positions) unless we can prove that our way of doing things is the superior True Christiantm way of doing things. 

While certainly there are some areas of stark division that are important to define(such as divinity of Christ, salvation by Christ alone, etc) we have made every issue into a "die on this hill" battle cry.  And we look like idiots and destroy our witness when we do so.

A number of years ago I had a friend who was consulting with a struggling church.  They were demographically much closer to death than college and very old fashioned in their church practices(hymns, organ music, bell choirs, etc).  If something did not change relatively soon the church would have to close their doors.  The unchurched in their area were mostly young professionals with families and they had been wholly incapable at reaching them. 

The suggestion was offered that they needed to consider changing their church service "style".  Cutting back on traditional hymns and men and women in full three piece suit get ups and adding contemporary music and dressing more casually to help foster a more inviting atmosphere to the young and unchurched. 

One particular curmudgeon was infuriated by the suggestion.  There is no way he could stand by and let such terrible things transpire.  The consultant than painted a picture of what could happen if they did so by describing a young single mother in the area who would be more willing to come to a service that seemed more able to communicate with her and that what a wonderful hope it could be for her to get to hear the gospel and respond in faith.  He then asked the old curmudgeon if the possibility of seeing this young lady come to Christ was worth giving up on some traditions?  

The one word response; "NO!"

In Matthew 15 Jesus and his disciples are eating....WITHOUT WASHING THEIR HANDS!!!!  While mothers everywhere may have gagged a bit, the Pharisees went one step farther.  They called Jesus out for letting his disciples defile themselves, SPIRITUALLY, by doing so.  Their complaints weren't about hygiene, but that it had been common TRADITIONAL practice that a truly spiritual and good Jewish person washed his hands to protect himself from spiritual defilement.

Jesus, like he was wont to do, blasted them.  To sum it up(and do click the link and read the whole thing....) He points out that they have allowed MAN created traditions to supersede God's revealed truth. 

What traditions do you hold to that are man made?  And lets be brutally honest here.  No where does it say that an organ and Amazing Grace are the only way to worship in song.  Neither does it say that a guitar and 10,000 Reasons is better! 

The way you do church might be great.  But your style of doing church is not what matters.  What matters it the content of your service!

1)  Is Christ crucified preached?

2)  Is the Bible the center of your teaching?

3)  Is salvation by Christ alone taught?

4)  Are people challenged and encouraged to love each other, to bear with one another, and to grow in maturity?

5) Does your service try its best to honor God FIRST and to also communicate effectively to those who need it?

If those things are not true of your church service then it does not matter if your style is objectively "good".  And if those five things are the natural position of the hearts of your churches leadership, then style will never be permanently static!

Here is a great place of conviction for you and your church.  When was the last time an unchurched person visited on a Sunday morning....AND CAME BACK?!?!

So where do you fall on the spectrum of man made traditions?  What are you willing to change, and what you are not?

The Church as a Marriage

After my post about "What Good is a Church" went viral yesterday(I have a very loose understanding of the definition of viral) I received a few "criticisms".  So I wanted to illuminate a little more on my thoughts about being a part of a church.

The most important point in all of this that I cannot repeat enough is that there is ZERO precedence in scripture for Christian's operating outside of the local church.  If someone could point out to me where in the city of Corinth there was the local church AND a couple of friends hanging out at the local coffee shop(or wherever well bred hipsters liked to frequent) who never went to spend time within the local church and that this was presented as equally valid I would concede my point entirely.

Can't find it....?

Because it's not there.  I have yet to come across a Biblical basis for avoiding participation in a local church.  I hear lots of personal anecdotes that sound like self-serving justifications, but never the Biblical basis for it!

There is no point where the writers of the New Testament did not assume that the natural practice of believers would not include participation in the church.  Paul even goes as far as to give CORPORATE instructions to how they should be conducting themselves when they met together.  As Paul established churches during his missionary journeys he also appointed LEADERS(elders) of those churches who were instructed with teaching and protecting the Gospel message.

Again, everything in the New Testament points to active participation within the local church. 

Does this mean that every local church lives up to its responsibilities?  Of course not.  But we don't quit on it all together when we encounter serious issues.  For example, you are attending a church and discover that they are teaching Jesus Christ is not the only way to heaven(aka universalism).  You would be well advised to exit quickly.  Or another church is abusing its members in some capacity.  Authoritarian control, shaming, power abuses, etc.  Get out of there as well. 

Sometimes, depending on where you live, finding a solid(but not perfect) Bible teaching church can be a challenge.  But don't give up just because the first one you visited had significant problems.

While no analogies are perfect, I think this one can help...comparing marriage to the Church.

Sometimes there are abusive and destructive marriages.  People should be protected from these situations.  While we understand someone who has come out of that situation might be wary about dating again, but wouldn't we be saddened if they have decided to give up on finding love at all because of the terrible situation from their past.  

To paraphrase a bit of CS Lewis, the whole reason you are able to recognize something as functioning incorrectly is that you have an indwelt sense of what is right.  If you recognize a problem at a past church, it doesn't mean that there is no good church, it means that you have solidified the truth that there is an appropriate way that a church SHOULD be functioning. 

Many wonderful Christians have walked away from participating in church life and, as of now, don't feel any "ill effects" from it.  Sometimes this is used as proof that the church was unnecessary for them(and perhaps for anyone..??)

I have had a number good friends that due to life circumstances(job and school) have had to live for long periods of time apart from their spouse.  While they certainly came through the other side with their marriage intact, how odd would it be for them to say, "I really liked not having to deal with you every day, can we keep living in different cities....?"  When you marry someone you are committing to sharing your life with that person.  Not just the convenient and fun stuff, but wading through the junk as well. 

When I hear someone tell me that they don't have to go to church to be a Christian I have a few thoughts.  First, I agree!!  Going to church doesn't make you a Christian.  Jesus's death and resurrection does!  But then I think about marriage.  Do you have to actually share your life with someone(emotionally and physically) to be married?  Of course not.  But you are kinda missing the point of marriage if you refuse to share your life with that other imperfectly perfect person. 

The problem is we like the "idea" of things, but not the things themselves.  The idealized picture I have of marriage is beautiful and inspiring.  The reality is often quite different.  The idealized picture we have of the Church is also beautiful and inspiring.  And reality is quite different there as well. 

To add one more part to this thinking.  What if your husband or wife said, "Honey I love you sooo much, but living with you makes it really hard to keep loving you so much.  I think we would be much better off if we spent as little time(if any) together so that I can keep thinking my lofty thoughts about the beauty of marriage". 

We love marriage, we fight against married life.

We love Jesus, but we fight against Christian living. 

Can you be a Christian who never goes to church?  Sure.  Can you be married and never spend time with your spouse?  Sure.  But why in the world would you accept that for yourself?

What good is a Church?

We Americans love our individualism.  No one to tell us what to do, no one to tell us we are wrong.  One of the reasons entrepreneurship is so high in the good ole US of A is that so many people don't like working for/with other people.  And we like our "religious" life like we like our jobs.  Our own!

A friend of mine from my former ministry world was married to a great gal who I enjoyed highly.  On the outside they seemed like a loving God fearing couple who enjoyed serving in ministry together.  Not long after they left their ministry "jobs" they stopped attending church all together.  They were looking to do something more "organic" and felt the structured formality of the "church" was a hindrance to real ministry. 

A few years after that my friend decided he just wasn't interested in marriage anymore and since he knew God just wanted him to be happy he called it quits on his wife and young child.  A few of us went to confront him about it and it was the most odd conversation I remember ever having with someone.  He had always had some fringe theological beliefs but his new positions were completely unhinged from scripture.  When we asked him what Christian men he was involved with who he would allow to speak into his life he claimed he didn't need it because he had the Holy Spirit....which was continuing to confirm for him everything he wanted to do anyways....

Today he refuses to talk to any Christians, and not even his own parents, because everyone in his life stood up against his crazy and self-serving viewpoints.  He wanted to define Christianity through the lens of himself and was completely unwilling to be challenged on any of his viewpoints. 

I read a great quote by Timothy Keller the other day.  "If your god never disagrees with you, you might just be worshiping an idealized version of yourself."

Today we worship ourselves, rarely do we worship the one true Living Creator God of all the Universe.  Who became flesh in the person of Jesus Christ and who came to Earth, died on the cross, and rose again.  What is the most obvious way we show that we are worshipping self?

We leave the Church.

I don't mean you stopped attending the local First Liberty Baptist Methodist Living Water Tabernacle that your grandma went to.  I mean we have decided that we get to decide by ourselves what Christianity looks like and we don't want anyone getting in the way of interpreting God as high fiving us as we leave our wives and kids.....

Our favorite misquoted Bible Passage to support this travesty is Matthew 18:20, "For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.” 

See?!?!?  I don't need a Church, just 2 of us and "BOOOM!!"  Church!! 

Yay proof texting.

As a reminder....Read more than a single sentence to understand the Bible. 

What is the full context of Matthew 18's claim of "2 or 3"?  It is about dealing with sin WITHIN the Church.  First you go privately, then you go with a few friends, then you go get the CHURCH.  Did you catch that?  This whole passage is written in the assumption that an individual is actively involved in their local Church.

I am not going to bore you with details here...But read for yourself.  The entirety of the New Testament is written in the context of believers tightly woven into the life of a local Church.  The assumption is that a Christian is WITHIN the local Church.  And what is the local church tasked with?  Holding firm to the faith, teaching truth, correcting sin, supporting their members, preaching the Gospel. 

Are many of the commands written to the Church able to be appropriately translated into the lives of individuals?  Of course.  But they are not distinctly separate from the community of believers.  There is no Biblical precedence for autonomous individuals creating their own version of Christianity outside of the life of the local body. 

So what good is the Church?

First:  Jesus established the Church and his disciples(apostles) established local churches to be the functioning and visible picture of the Universal Church.  The New Testament is written in the context of this community.  So before you talk about anything else, we have to recognize that being grafted into a local body of believers is the expected normal state of being for a Christian.

Second:  What about my friend I told you about?  The Church has a role in our lives to stand up for truth and call us to the carpet when we sin.  And not just private sin, but sin that harms others.  If we separate ourselves from the body, who will support you and call you out on your bologna?  I can theorize why he left the church....its quite simple really...he wanted to do what HE wanted to do, and didn't want anyone to call him out. 

The Church is the central and visible practice of the Christian life.  Sitting alone on a mountain top contemplating deep theological thoughts is not why Christ died for you.  

We like to think our individualism makes us so unique.  Instead, we are often just selfish and think we are better than others

 

Upon Criticism of the Church

Our problems and issues fall into two categories;  Private and public.  No matter what our problem is, it will fall into either of those categories.  Private means exactly that.  It is something between you and those who it directly effects(spouse, friend, co-worker).  Public problems are those that are visible to many and effect many in one way or the other.  Dealing with either category of problem requires addressing it in its appropriate context.

If you and your spouse have an argument, or, if you say something hurtful, it is unhelpful to go blast them to your friends and family.  Taking a private matter public can exponentially increase the original problem. 

When dealing with a public problem, it is necessary to deal with it publicly.  Or, at least, showing clearly the resolution publicly.  If your spouse demeans you and ridicules you in a public way(blogging, telling everyone in their life, etc) then there has to be public reconciliation.  If you only deal with it privately and never publicly own up to the behavior, all those who became involved are left in the lurch and are left assuming either; A) you are still a big jerk, or, B) Your spouse is still an idiot.  And those who were hurt by your public behavior never get to experience real resolution themselves. 

In the Church at large we have real problem with dealing with "problems".  The advent of mass media, internet, social sites, etc, have blurred greatly this line between public and private.  Things that used to be "private"(sermons, teachings, dealing with someone in your church's sin, etc) are now viewed as public.  And all of us "watch dogs" now know something that happened on the other side of the country. This leads us to make bold pronouncements about what we think really happened, whether or not we have any ability to know the full context of what actually happened.

To illustrate;  Say I publicly, on my wildly well read blog, took my wife to task for some failing.  I go on and on about her failure and refusal to change.  Then the thousands and thousands of you who read it will then feel compelled to publicly(because I made it public) chime in and criticize my wife.  But maybe you don't know the whole story.  Perhaps I have been verbally and physically abusing my wife for years.  But all you know is my side of the story. 

This is so often what I observe in Church and pastor criticism today.  As a pastor myself I run into stories all the time from people about how bad their "old" church and pastor were.  I may know absolutely nothing about their situation, they just want me to say, "man, you are so right, they are a bunch of jerky jerks!!"  Here is the fun part...Later I discover that this person who had all the complaints is a real pain in the neck.  Not that I don't love them and want the Gospel to work in their lives.  But I suddenly "get" why they had some issues with their old church and pastor.

On a larger scale, you can't read much in the Christian blogosphere without bumping into all sorts of accusations thrown around about "this" denomination, "that" church, or, "these" theologian/pastors.  Countless words and internet traffic are consumed by creating "safe places" for people to unaccountably brandish their criticisms of others. 

The vast majority that I have read and followed over the years have two things in common; 1) Completely one sided(aka, my wife is bad, but I didn't tell you about how I beat her), or, 2) There are no facts, just inferences.(aka, I can't see his financial accounting, which must mean he is stealing money from the church/ministry). 

What is also quite obvious about these public criticisms is that they are often sourced in strong doctrinal and theological differences.  If you read an "attack" on a Reformed Complimentarian leader, 9 times out of 10 it was written by an Egalitarian Arminian.  And vice versa.  We can become so "tribal" in our own little pet theologies and doctrines that we are pre-emptively looking for the boogeyman to jump out when we look at those who don't agree with us. 

He is a reformed complimentarian, then any problems a woman has ever had at his church is because he clearly abuses women!  She is a Arminian egalitarian, you just know she conducts gay weddings and is a universalist!  We take our public theological differences and assume private sin and publicly insinuate it. 

Most "normal" Christians are tragically untrained in these weighty issues, and so they don't even realize when the accusations they are reading are sourced in these differences, and, not necessarily definitive actual proof of sin and malfeasance. 

So, with all of that in mind, here are my guide lines for public criticism of the Church and leaders within it(celebrity or otherwise)

You can publicly criticize/discuss if:

1)  You are discussing theological and doctrinal differences.  BUT, you must stick to the known issues.  For instance, I don't agree with your publicly stated "Calvinist" position, and here are my reasons why I disagree, BIBLICALLY, with your position and am advocating for "Arminianism". 

And we must stick to what that person actually said, not what someone else once said they think a particular position means.  For example, there are people who are 3 point Calvinists.  So, don't criticize them for their support of points 4 and 5....because they actually AGREE with you on that point.  Mischaracterizing their position doesn't help anyone.

2)  You are sharing public FACTS.  Meaning, here in these publicly available court documents is the verification that this person did indeed embezzle money.  Or, we have a video of him hitting his wife.  No he said/she said baloney.  Stick to the facts, if you don't have verifiable facts, you are publicly defaming someone for your own "enjoyment".  Even if you are pretty sure you are right, don't do it! 

3)  It doesn't matter how many "coincidences" and "related issues" there are.  One of the great tricks that gets played on us is overwhelming our thinking process with a bunch of mostly true information followed by a strong conclusion.  If you have a church with 15k people, just because you can find 20 people from the last 20 years who have a "similar" issue doesn't prove anything.  You go deal with tens of thousands of people for decades and you will have at least that many people who felt you did them wrong. 

4)  Just because you made public a private problem they might have, doesn't mean that they owe you a public apology.  So, don't keep asking for it.  If they privately hurt you, go to them privately.  If they refuse to listen, bring in leadership.  If they refuse to listen to leadership, move on with a clear conscience.  If they publicly hurt you, then you AND ONLY YOU, have the right to publicly defend yourself and ask for public repentance. 

If you can't follow these 4 simple guidelines, then please stay away from the interwebs.  If someone you read/talk to, can't follow these guidelines, quit encouraging them! 

Nor should you Lucille!!